My post-graduation job hunt is over, as I recently accepted a position working in a group foster home. I am officially entering the psychology field!
Working in a foster home was one of the jobs I specifically went after. I’m passionate about impacting children and adolescents, particularly those who have dealt with abuse and mental and emotional issues. All of the kids at a group home have experienced some kind of trauma, and most of them have suffered extreme or extensive abuse. It gives me great joy that I have the opportunity to have a positive impact on their lives and get to know each child and their individual story.
As relieving and exciting as it is to start a job in my field, there are so many fears that come with it. The uncertainty in my life has simply switched directions. I was living in the unknown of lacking structure in my day-to-day life and lacking consistent income, but now there is a whole new world of unknowns to deal with. I expect that there will be both joy and difficulty, but all I can do is wonder about what it’ll be like.
Group homes are an intense environment. Because of the amount of trauma these kids have been through, they have pervasive behavioral and emotional issues. Their behaviors come out against other kids in the home as well as against staff. I have been warned many times about the verbal and physical aggression I would be experiencing as staff.
Regardless of the fact that this is such an unknown and intense environment, I’ve felt drawn towards it. God has put it on my heart to enter this area of work and hold his hand in trust as I take my first step into it. No matter how many horror stories I’ve heard about group homes, and the fear that has crept in because of it, I still have a passion for getting to know the kids and doing what I can to change their lives. I still have a desire to understand the environment and figure out how to do the best I possibly can.
I don’t know whether my passion is going to build and thrive, or whether it will fizzle into a bitter burnout. I don’t know whether I will pick up the training easily and be able to gain the trust and respect of the kids, or whether it’ll be the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I continually go over these variables in my mind, praying about it, talking about it. But no matter how much thought or discussion I engage in, it won’t give me answers. I just won’t know until I do it.
That’s what stepping out in faith looks like. You don’t know what you’ll gain or lose or how hard it’ll be, you just know God led you there. Trusting God means giving of yourself no matter the outcome. Because when we step into the unknown, there’s no way we can hold on to control. It’s in God’s hands now.
In Christ’s love,